Do You Feel Like You Should Have It All Figured Out? Here's Why You Don’t Need To!

Neuroscience and brain-based coaching back up the fact that uncertainty is not only okay, it’s actually a good thing. So, take a deep breath.

By Jo Talbot

Let’s be honest: when you're in college or just starting out in your career, it can feel like you're supposed to have everything figured out. The pressure to know what your future looks like, what job you want, and how to handle adulthood can be a lot. But guess what? You don’t need to have it all sorted out right now. Actually, neuroscience and brain-based coaching say that not knowing is not just okay, it's actually beneficial. So, take a deep breath.

Your Brain Is Still Growing

Here’s a fun fact: your brain doesn’t fully mature until you’re about 25. Yep, even though you may legally be an adult, your prefrontal cortex (the part of your brain that helps with decision-making, planning, and controlling impulses) is still under construction. This means that the pressure to make these huge life decisions — like choosing a career or locking down your future plans — is hitting a brain that’s still learning to juggle all of those big ideas. So if you’re feeling overwhelmed, that’s actually totally normal. Your brain is doing its thing—growing and adapting.

Perfectionism Is a Trap (And Your Brain Knows It)

It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking you need to have it all figured out, especially when it seems like everyone around you is crushing it. But perfectionism? It’s not helping. In fact, it can get in the way.

Here’s the deal: when you feel stressed about making the 'wrong' choice, your brain can get stuck in a cycle of fear and avoidance (thanks, amygdala!). This leads to procrastination, overthinking, or even freezing up entirely. It’s like your brain is saying, “Let’s just avoid this altogether.”

Instead, brain-based coaching encourages a growth mindset — the idea that mistakes aren’t failures; they’re part of the process. When you allow yourself to mess up and learn, your brain actually rewards you with dopamine, making it easier to keep going. So, don’t stress about making the 'perfect' decision. Embrace trial and error, and trust that you’re learning along the way.

Uncertainty = Opportunity

Here’s where it gets exciting: your brain is super adaptable. Neuroplasticity means that your brain can change based on new experiences, so you’re not locked into any one decision for life.

College is a time for exploration — you’re figuring out who you are, what you’re passionate about, and what kind of life you want to create. And guess what? That process takes time. So if you change your major, take a gap year, or switch career paths later on — no big deal. Your brain is designed to adapt, so don’t feel like you have to have everything set in stone right now.

Surround Yourself with Support (And Cut Yourself Some Slack)

No one said you had to do this alone. Lean on your friends, family, professors, and mentors (like us!). Having a support system can make a world of difference, helping you navigate uncertainty without feeling overwhelmed.

Plus, self-compassion is a game-changer. Be kind to yourself! 🥰 When you mess up or feel lost, treat yourself with the same understanding and patience you’d offer a friend. Your brain’s emotional regulation system responds positively when you practice self-compassion, making it easier to bounce back and keep moving forward.

Bottom Line: You Don’t Have to Have It All Figured Out

At the end of the day, college is about growth, exploration, and learning — both in and out of the classroom. You don’t need to have every step of your life planned out. Your brain is still figuring things out too, and that’s completely fine. So, give yourself permission to embrace uncertainty, make mistakes, and change direction along the way. Trust the process, trust yourself, and know that you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. ✨

Get in touch to find out how a coach could be the trusted partner you need!